Close-knit Community

 A Close-Knit Community — whether a village, a scattering of country farms, a city neighborhood — is a place where people know their neighbors and look after them. - tvtropes.org 

As a Filipino, it’s in our culture to celebrate most events with not just family, but friends and neighbors, as well. In my whole life, I have never spent a birthday without celebrating it with, at the very least, my family. I think it’s a natural thing for us to think that birthdays are spent with family and, not just with friends. Not only that, for as long as I can remember, it’s been a long-standing tradition to spend Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year’s Eve together with other members of the family.

When we were still living in the Philippines, our family lived in the same barangay (Filipino term for village) until we immigrated to the US. So, naturally, I came to know who’s who; from the people who have been living there before I was born, to new people moving in.

Just mention your last name and people will know who you parents and grandparents are. If they don't know who they are, then they most certainly know at least your aunt, uncle or cousin. Most people, probably, even know where your house is. So, depending on the situation, it can be a good thing or a bad thing.

In my case, a community that knew me and my family was mostly a good thing. There was this one time, when I was around 4 or 5 years old, I got lost in a traditional market. I went with my dad and got lost after leaving a stall selling toys. Minutes after I got separated from my dad, one of his friends, living in the street next to ours, found me and brought me home in an instant. Whenever my dad tells the story to my cousins, now, he always mentions how thankful he is that his friend found me right then. It's one of the reasons why I'm all for a tight-knit community. People show care and interest in your well-being, looking after you as if you were their own.

Photo taken after playing outside with some neighborhood kids, along with my sister and cousins, when I was 12

Another common scene during my childhood was the memory of me playing outside from morning to night with the from my street, and the kids from the next street over. We played with variety of things. From playing with cards to playing with jumping ropes made of rubber bands to dodge ball, we played together outside despite the scorching weather, until sundown. 

Photo taken with my sister, cousins and neighbors after the summer basketball league I helped  to organize and facilitate

Today, from what I observe, kids don’t really play outside with other kids as much. They are either inside the house watching TV shows or surfing the internet. My little cousins behave this way, and my heart always aches for them. They’re missing a lot of things. They should be out and about making memories with other people, but instead, they stay inside their houses, playing with things that can never replace the existence of a real life friend.

Maybe it’s just me who feels this way, or maybe it’s just the cities we have lived in so far, but I feel like there is some disconnectedness between neighbors here in the America. As I’ve mentioned in my other blog post before, in the span of 4-5 years, our family has moved to different cities over 4 times already. And, in all the places we’ve lived so far, we always had to be wary in everything we do because the neighbors, whose name or face we don’t even remember, might complain.

Perhaps, this disconnectedness is a part of the current American culture. It can be due to the individualistic nature being emphasize in the culture. Or, it can be that people just don’t have the luxury to let it happen because their lifestyle inhibits it. However, despite that I wish and hope that people will be more open to connecting with their neighbors, just like how we are in the Philippines. Not only does it improve your social network and skills, but it also gives you the opportunity to create valuable memories that you won’t be able to find anywhere else.

However, if we want to see change, we can't just wait and hope for something to happen. So, in order link neighbors to each other, we have to take things in our hands and start reaching out to them. In my case, I will try hard to connect with our neighbors by greeting them regularly, and inviting them over whenever we have hold celebration parties. I hope that by the time my birthday comes next year, we are able to connect and communicate better, just like how it was in my neighborhood in the Philippines.